Last days in Fresno...

Just wanted to post some pictures from our last days in Fresno over the last week.

TWO WEEKS BEFORE MOVING

Grandma Dorene came for a visit!

Last game night at our house, with my friends from work... :(

Rob, Margaret, Doug, Steph, Mike, Gizelle, Sean

FRIDAY JULY 20, 2012

On my way to Santa Cruz I realized this was my last chance to visit Brianna's grave.  I took some very colorful flowers (she would have been 8 yrs old... I think the brighter the better!) to her one last time.  It was a very relaxing, non rushed time for me.

SATURDAY JULY 21, 2012

 Hanging out in Santa Cruz with my family

Chris, Melissa (and her two sisters, Marianne and Mallory), Terry, Renee, Josh, Jordan and Jenna, 

and a new friend, Liz :) 

Me and my bro!!

We all ran the wharf to wharf on Sunday and celebrated Renee's 40th birthday!

(I have pics but can't them off my phone :(...)

TUESDAY JULY 24, 2012

A Going Away Dinner

 Emery and Papa

We had a great dinner together.  One of those "one-last-time-this-was-great-why-didn't-we-do-this-more-often" times.  But it really was a wonderful evening of dinner, laughing (watching King of Queens... I was laughing more at my step-dad laughing! lol), and talking. Love you guys soooo much!!!

 Emery sitting on Grandma's bench (my mom)

 Mommy and daughter on grandma's bench

Grandma Sherril playing with Emery

WEDNESDAY 25, 2012

Our Going Away Party at the Park

We had a great time with those that came out to say goodbye.  We stayed until about 9pm. Many wonderful friends, some new and some long-time, came to love on us.  So glad I had the opportunity to love on them back!

 Robert, Julie, Tammy, and Jeff

 Dawn, Renee, Jordan and Tonya

 Tonya, friend first... supervisor in OR second ;)

Me and Julie!  Friends of 17 years!

SATURDAY July 28, 2012

Emery's last soccer game with auntie Nae Nae

(while we finished packing and loading up... thanks Nae! A huge help!)

 Lynne, our neighbor, playing with Em at her restaurant

 Huong and Lynne and our family

(we are their favorite neighbors!!!)

Luke and Heidi joined us at our favorite chinese restaurant!

SUNDAY JULY 29, 2012

After Sean drove away, I rushed to get ready for church (in 10 min!!).  I headed to the Well for the 9am service to see Madeline (below) get dedicated.  But I was 5 min late and missed it. :(  I stayed and worshipped with my closest friends and then headed over to People's for one last time in church, at my church, with my family.  Also, the gals in the nursery were so sad to say goodbye to Emery, so it was one more time for them to see her.  

It was an amazing service.  Worship was a different experience for me.  Half way through I become very emotional as the words of worship kept ringing phrases of surrendering and that God is all I need and all I want.  Given that my whole life just drove off in a truck, half way across the country, these words rung true.  And I felt, honestly, ready to surrender all that I've ever known, here in the comfort of Fresno, for whatever the Lord has for us in Texas.  I have no doubt that this move was begun 6 years ago, and orchestrated in this past year, by God Himself.  Complete peace.  It could be scary.  But there is no fear when we are walking with the Lord.  Praise God!!!  There are NEW things on the horizon.  Things we could never imagine.  hahahaha.... I just thought of this.... but at our wedding, my brother and sister-in-law sang "It's a Whole New World".  That's how our life and marriage has been. ... even now.... A whole new world.  

 Emery chillin' with the birthday girl

My beautiful, blessed friends!  

Me. Lisa, Heather, Tonia, Daniela (new friend :) wish we had more time), and Katie (in front)

Oh how my life has been full and blessed in these last few years by the impact you've had on my life.  I love you soooo much!!!

FRIENDS FOREVER!!!!

MONDAY JULY 30, 2012

 I met my friend Alicia for coffee and we took Emery to the water garden at Todd Beamer Park. It was awesome!  I'd been wanting to take her there but never did.  So sad.  

We had a great time though!

WEDNESDAY AUGUST 1, 2012

Our last playdate at Lisa's house

 Teacher Lisa with all the kids :)

 Evan, Emery and Ryan (not sure if I got that right...lol) swimming!

 Mylah and Emery just hanging out

 Me and the boys.... Ryan and Evan Taylor

The title of godparents was given to us when they were born.  There were born only two weeks after Emery, ON my due date. lol  I love these boys with all my heart!!!  They will always be my godchildren in my heart!!!  Always and forever!  And I hope, somehow, someway, they will still grow up knowing Emery.  And maybe, just maybe, she will still marry one of them!! (Ryan is in the lead, so far)

Farewell... but not goodbye

Well, it's been 4 days so far in our new home in Texas.  I want to share the events of the day I left.  I will post again with what we've been doing the past 4 days.  But for now....

Well first of all, my farewell at the airport was so perfect!  Of course, it can always be better.  My dad and my sister-in-law were going to come see me off, but could not make it due to unforeseen circumstances.  I was disappointed, as were they, but I totally understood.  The only downside was that I didn't feel like I got that final hug and words of goodbye.  I don't know, maybe it was for the best.  But I know they would have been there if they could.  So my four bestest friends came!  I wasn't expecting this.  I had thought of asking, but didn't want anyone to feel guilted into coming, nor did I want them to feel bad if they couldn't.  So no expectations.  But at our final playdate the day before they all started talking about coming.  I was so excited.  My very best friend of 25 years and her hubby are the ones who took me in for the 4 days after Sean left for Texas.  We had planned for her to take me to the airport, but since I was driving my brother's car for the week (who was in TX with Sean), I ended up driving myself so he could simply drive himself home.  It worked out great!  Michelle said she would meet me there, but honestly I wasn't going to be surprised if she didn't come.  She has been so rational and logical about my moving that I thought she would rather end it on the unemotional, easy "see you later", that we had at her house that morning as I rushed to the airport.  But I was so excited when she walked through those doors at the airport.  Sean's dad also came out to see us off.  He mostly spent time with Emery and I'm so glad he did.  He needed that!  So it was Bill and my 4 girls!  ... Michelle, Lisa, Tonia and Heather.  We met at Starbucks inside and had coffee together one last time.  The boys, Evan and Ryan, were also there to say farewell to their girlfriend, Emery.  And as I headed to security after some very emotional goodbyes with floods of tears (I was a wreck), they stayed there, in a line facing me, until the very end.  I cannot tell you what that was like.  Those girls are everything to me!  My life is forever blessed and full because of their friendships!  And this is NOT goodbye.  They are forever my friends!  I can only look forward with anticipation until we visit each other and that time will be beautiful!  Well, security had to go through my diaper bag (as they were calling for final boarding for my flight!!).  And I thought the girls had left.  (I was going to do a dance for them before running off!... dang! it would have been hilarious and stopped all tears! lol)  but they had only moved over to the windows to watch me walk to my gate.  So as soon as I got my bag back, I took off in a sprint, pushing the stroller!  What a sight I must've been!  But it was a close one as I had waited until the very last second to leave them.  It was so hard.  But there were no time for sobs as I ran to the gate.  It's a good thing since everyone was staring at me when I got on the plane.  The stewardess had already seen the look in the guy's eyes when he saw me coming with a baby and she therefore asked a teenage girl if she wouldn't mind switching with him.  She had it all worked out by the time I got to my seat.  So sweet!  Mariah was the 13 year old's name.  She loved Emery.  It was so cool.  And off we flew.... into the wild blue yonder! ;)

Me and Lisa 

Tonia, Lisa, Heather and I, hanging out at the airport before we left.

Saying good-bye to my boys, Evan and Ryan.

Emery, Evan and Ryan at the airport.

 Grandpa and Emery!

 Kevin with Emery, just after getting off his plane, and just before we both lost it... lots of tears!

 My best friends at the airport!  Michelle, Heather, Tonia and Lisa... they are sooooo supportive of this move. ;)

The first flight to Phoenix was good.  Emery was awake but behaved for the most part.  I was able to keep her distracted for the hour and a half flight.  We had a short rest in Phoenix and then it was back on the plane.  As soon as we took flight, Emery was out and slept the entire 2 hours!!!  Praise God!  He is SO good!  Because it really could have gone either way.  In fact, even I got to rest to the point that she was slipping slightly as my body relaxed. lol  no worries though, she couldn't have fallen anywhere, there's no room in those planes! :)

Emery and I resting on our way to Dallas

When I got off the plane, I put Emery in her stroller telling her it would probably be a long walk.  Although I really wanted her out so she could walk to daddy.  But I only walked a few yards and then through a round about and was immediately at the baggage claim.  I was looking for the right area when I looked to my right and there was Sean!!!  I literally screamed with excitement and ran to him!  All the stress of the 7 days prior, came to an end when I saw his face!  It was the best moment!  I had my husband back!  Emery had her daddy back!  And we were a family again.  It is a weird feeling being in your home city, but your whole life just drove away in a truck.  And I was left to last minute logistics, cleaning our house for our renters and saying all my emotional goodbyes.... alone.  It was definitely harder than I had expected.  But in this moment with my husband, all of that passed away.  I was home... because home is, really, where he is.

Four days.... no husband... no home... interesting...

Everyday this week, this continues to get harder and harder.  Saying goodbye is never easy.  Saying goodbye when you have so many regrets is even worse.  It's been beautiful the moments we have had with friends and family this past week as we have those one-last-time dinners.  Then we realize how much fun it was and the reality sets in that this will be the last time.  And why didn't we do it sooner?  ... more often?  In hind sight, we can always do things better... more often... more intentionally.  But it only serves to remind me the wonderful relationships God has given me.  I can't walk away with regret.  I have to be content and at peace with what I've been able to do.  And hopefully, even though maybe less often than desired, I did those times well.  Yet there are some... that confuse me.  That hurt.  That leave me wanting, wondering, and I know that only God can give me peace in those relationships.  I hope that God can and will do a work and they will only grow stronger.  God IS faithful in this way.   (I wrote this 7/25/12)

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First some pics from our loading and Sean's moving day!

 My sweet friends, Tonia (here) and Heather came to help pack!

 And our sweet friend Heidi helped for 2 days straight!

 Our renters were no help... just waiting for us for get out!  LOL

 jk... they were actually a big help!

Brian came after work friday night!

 hahahaahahaha!!!

 Getting ready to say goodbye to each other

 My crazy brother... Sean is in for a fun trip!

 All set!

 Happy Trails!

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Well.... tonight is my last night in Fresno, California.  It's so weird.  This week has been crazy since Sean left.  Between deep cleaning an entire house by myself, to last minute details, to taking care of Emery and yet trying to get in all the family/friend time I can before I leave.  I thought it would be better to stay a few days longer and fly to Texas after Sean arrives there. I was always worried I would end up anxious to leave once he left.  But then I hoped I could relax once he left and the packing and loading was done, and could enjoy time with friends.  But I was right. I should have known.  Although I have not been anxious, I have been overwhelmed, stressed with all that I had to do alone, felt homeless, displaced and discombobulated (I have no idea how to spell that!  lol)   But I have been so blessed by the time I've had with everyone, so I'm so glad I stayed! 

Sunday after Sean left, I went to church and then a quick first year birthday party for my dear friend, Heather's, daughter.  Then it was straight to cleaning.  I put Emery down for a nap and cleaned for 3 solid hours.  Emery finally woke up and was really fussy and cranky.  She wouldn't let me put her down so I was trying to clean while holding her.  Finally she just started crying for no reason and there was nothing I could do to calm her down.  I instantly was frustrated and felt like a single stressed out, overwhelmed, mom.  I finally put her back in her crib in her empty room to cry it out.  I didn't know what else to do.  It only took her a minute and she calmed down.  But I realized that she definitely knew something was going on and all was not normal in her world.  It broke my heart.  She is so intuitive.  ((Because again on Tuesday morning, I brought her to the house to clean and was there with her for 30 min before Michelle arrived to watch her.  And she had a breakdown again.  I wanted to cry thinking she shouldn't have to be there in her house when it is so empty and daddy is missing from her world.  :(  I was counting the minutes until Michelle arrived))  I finally finished the upstairs and left with emery to head to Michelle's.  This was my final move from my home.  I had to take everything with me.  And I cried all the way to her house.  When I got there, there was no one home.  I took a shower and when I came out, Michelle was home and I cried some more.  lol  Then it was off to her sisters for dinner.  A wonderful, much-needed, evening with friends, good food and great wine!  It was the norm.  I needed that.  It was fabulous!

Monday I took Emery to her followup with the Endocrinologist for her delayed growth.  All is well... all labs and bone age xrays were within normal limits.  She is great.  Just small. :)  After that we met my sweet friend, Alicia, at the Grind for coffee and off to the Todd Beamer Park with the water garden. I've always wanted to take Emery there and never did. It was more awesome than I thought! Dang!  Now I'll have to find one in TX.  We had a wonderful time together.  Then it was on to meet one of my longest friends for lunch at Piazza del Pane.  I was supposed to take Emery to my friends for a nap but I lost my phone and didn't know her number or address, so Emery had to come with me.  But she was a trooper and did great during lunch.  By the time  I got back 'home' at Chelle's, I was exhausted.  Literally, my entire body was exhausted.  So Em and I napped for 2 hours.  Then I got to go to dinner with a bunch of girlfriends from work for a going away farewell!  It was great!

Tuesday, I headed over to finish cleaning at 9am.  Michelle hung out until 10:30 and then took Emery home.  I went and got my hair done (3 hours of peaceful bliss!!!!  So needed!!).  Then back to my house one last time to let the carpet cleaner in, run a couple errands, and a couple goodbyes to my neighbors (love them!).  Tuesday night, we spent at Terry and Renee's for dinner.  It was a wonderful evening.  I had a great time with the kids.  Emery went to bed at a normal time and we stayed until 10.   Once again, it was one of those times I thought, "dang, I should have done this more".  My goodbye with my brother was simply a very long hug and one last round of wrestling and tickle torture.  Just like old times.  There were no goodbyes.  I know this is killing him, and that kills me.  But God is helping me let him grieve how he needs to.  I know God will take care of him.... and me.

Today, I had breakfast with Chelle and then Emery and I headed to Lisa's for a last playdate.  There were 4 babies and 2 older girls.  We had a great time.  Minimal tears since they all decided to come to the airport tomorrow.  I put Emery down for a nap and stayed for a couple hours after everyone left.  Loved the one on one time I got with Lisa.  These times are few and far between these past 18 months since we are both new mommies.  It has definitely been an adjustment for our friendship but nothing else has changed.  Her friendship means so much to me.  We had a wonderful time talking life, love and children.  I'm so grateful for the wonderful friends God has put in my life over the last 2 years.  I couldn't ask for better friends!  After that we drove to Mattie's house to spend some time with her and my niece and nephew.  It was a great and fun time.  There were tears.  It sucks.  But I am so grateful for the support and involvement she and Brett have been in our lives during this transition.  They have moved to Missouri and then moved back.  So they know the good the bad and the ugly.  They are pretty honest, but in the end, trust our decision.  It means so much.  Today we talked about the future possibilites of meeting for family vacations as they are wanting to get back to Missouri sometime down the road.  I'm so excited at that thought!  

And then we were back "home" for one final dinner with the Cabezut's..  (which I cried about on the way home).  They have been our best friends for almost 20 years!  The times of hanging out, dinners, out of town trips are countless!  There were years in there that we spent one night every weekend hanging out over food and wine.  So many good memories.  (and OH Tom and his gourmet cooking! How I will miss that!)  Michelle and I have been through so much through the years.  We have been friends for 25 years!  I always say our relationship is like a marriage. There were times when we wanted to call it quits.  But every next thing we went through, and survived, only made us stronger.  I have a bond with her that can only be compared to a sister relationship.  It is a friendship like I have never had before and will never have again in  my lifetime.  And therefore makes it the hardest to leave.  It hurts my heart.  To think I will not be able to see her, have a soy capp with her or hug her for a very long while, is so difficult to comprehend.  And yet, I know that distance will not change our relationship.  We have been through so much that I know without a doubt that this is only one more thing that will strengthen us.  And I can't wait for her to come visit! ;)

So.... that brings us to tonight... 5 more minutes and it will officially be the day that I am moving to Texas.  My whole life, except Emery and a few clothes, are already there.  So we better follow!  I truly am so excited for this new time of our life.  I wanted to share more emotions and feelings in this post, but got wrapped up in the details of my own roller coaster ride for the last 4 days (sorry to bore you, it was really for my own journaling... lol).  So I will post again once I get internet in my new home (if not set up already).  Sean is sleeping his second night there with my brother, Kevin, who did the drive with him.  I'm anxious to get there and be back as a family together.  There are few words that can express how much this move means to me.  Sean and I have talked for many years about this.  We've talked for many years about many things and never did them.  So, the simple fact that we are actually, finally doing this is huge to me!  It's almost unbelievable.  In fact I think some people think we would never leave... that we were a mainstay in Fresno.  But... surprise!  We are more adventureous than you thought!!!  (than WE thought! ha!) 

Anyway.... I better stop this novel... I really need to get some sleep.  It will be one more long day.  A very emotional time of goodbyes at the airport, one final goodbye at the gate as Kevin gets off the plane and I get on it (God TOTALLY set this up for me!) and a one way flight to Dallas!  I'm ready!  Let's do this!

(I posted pics after the fact.... see post "Last Days in Fresno")

We have a place to call home!!!!

God is SO good!  It's just crazy to me how He continues to set things in place.  Every prayer we have prayed has been answered... every request we've had has been filled.  We don't even deserve it, and yet God just keeps showing us His faithfulness in this!

This past Sunday, Sean flew out to Texas to find us an apartment.  Since we only have the moving truck for one week, we have to find an apartment before we get there so Sean has somewhere to take and unload our stuff.  So off he went!  Although we didn't count on this trip, I did have enough miles to fly him out there, so Praise God!  (... but I had to sacrifice my trip back to Fresno in September to do the Tough Mudder... :(....but that's okay)   So for the last week and a half we've been doing research online lining up apartments for him to see.  We even found an apartment 'realtor' who also helped us.  There was one complex that Sean found himself constantly going back to.  He finally even said he had a feeling that was the 'one'.  It was called The Bluffs at Iron Horse in North Richland Hills.  On Saturday I sat down to make phone calls to find out availability so we could weed some out  so his time is used more wisely.  I only got through to one and left a bunch of messages at the others.  Well on Sunday, the ONLY complex that called me back was The Bluffs.  I told the guy that we were preferably looking for a 3 bedroom and we needed to move in August 1st.  He said "oh, well you're in luck, we just had some tenants move out of a 3 br suddenly and we need to get it rented asap".  I asked how much it was and he said normally it is $1355 but they were lowering it to $1255.  I said "Forever?!!"  And he said "um, yes, lol.... forever".  LOL!!!  I literally laughed in the phone because I knew this was all God's doing!  I had told Sean we can't go over $1250, but I think $5 is okay. :)  Sean had started out looking in Euless, straight off the plane, and had looked at two so far which he said were beautiful.  But now I texted him and told him he HAS to go to The Bluffs next!!  He did and he said it blew the others out of the water!!  They didn't have time to do the paperwork that night, so Sean had to go back the next morning.  He got there 30 min before they opened on Monday, with money order in hand, to make sure he was the first one.  By the end of the day, we were approved!   So it is their biggest apartment, 3 bedroom, 2 bath, jetted tub with seperate shower in the master, a huge storage space, and a large attached garage!  And we have room for my baby grand piano!!!  They are a luxury complex with many amenities.  2 pools, 4 hot tubs, basketball court (for Sean), sand volleyball (can't you see us now?!), stadium seating movie room you can reserve and on and on!1   It's funny, I'm so excited to live in an apartment again!  Not sure how long that will last.  We know there is always a down side to living in an apartment, but its a fun change and WE HAVE A POOL!!!!!  Yippeeeee!!!!!   But here's the kicker!  They waived the $300 deposit because I work in the medical field AND we got $200 off our first months rent!  Praise God!  I've been aware of the fact that we will be very low on money during the transition period.  We will both be jobless for a couple of weeks and then the delay for your first paycheck once you start work.  But every time I have thought about it, I immediately have had peace and have known that I don't need to worry because God will, and is, carrying us and providing.  So it is things like this that make me realize that He is doing just that.  It's awesome!  Crazy!  Now Sean has 3 days to look for a car for himself since we couldn't afford to ship his back there.  We had decided it just made more sense to sell it here because we had a quick buyer already.  So I'm praying that God will lead him to the right car for the right price while he's there!

 The view from our front door/porch

 Our garage is the one on the far right

Our front door on the far right 

For more pics of the complex click here!
http://www.apartments.com/Texas/North-Richland-Hills/The-Bluffs-at-Ironhorse/43830

This whole process has been exciting and yet so heart breaking at the same time.  There are those in my life that are very sad to see us go, but very happy for us.  There are those that have cried when I told them (some I was surprised they were that sad... so sweet).  There are those that choose to avoid the issue altogether.  But I am coming to realize, very slowly, that each one of us will deal with it very differently.  We will all grieve in our own way.  So I am learning to have grace for each one and accept the differences.  I just love my family and friends SO very much, but I can't protect each one from a hurting heart.  And I can't hold back our dreams to stay here to prevent hurt.  All I can do is love and entrust them into the loving arms of our Saviour.  Only He can give true peace.   This is so hard and yet so exciting.  It's definitely bittersweet.  But I believe with all my heart that God has something amazing on the other side of this.  And I can hardly wait to see what it is!!!

More of God's hand in this...

The last post was so long, I had to end it somewhere... but I wanted to share another big way we've seen God in all of this in just the past few weeks.

A huge prayer request was our house.  We have gone back and forth over the past year about whether to sell it or rent it.  In January, we put it up For Sale by Owner.  We had it for sale for about 4 months.  Sean held a few open houses, we got a few calls from Craigs List, we even had a few very interested people wanting to do a lease to purchase option.  But in the end, nothing came through.  About ten months ago, Sean and his friend Jim talked about the possibility of he and his wife renting it.  But their apartment lease was not up until August 1.  Supposedly Tanya was pretty bummed because she said she would have loved to move in here.  So that topic was dropped.  Well a few months ago Sean and I had discussed that if nothing came open for him to promote then we would just move to DFW and he would take a transfer.  He wanted to set a date that that would happen.  At first, it was July 1.  Then as it got closer, I expressed to him that this was very emotional for me and, though it may seem silly, my birthday was coming up July 23 and I was signed up to run the Wharf to Wharf from Santa Cruz to Capitola with my brothers and sisters-in-law.  So he said ok then we'll say August 1.  Then only about a month before all of this came down with us moving, Sean and Jim talked again, this time more seriously.  But once again the issue of their lease came up.  We didn't think much of it until I was offered the job at Cook and as we looked at the calendar to see when my possible start day would be and therefore our possible move, would you believe it was August 1!!!!  We just laughed!  It is becoming fun to watch how everything truly is falling into place.  Well we soon found out that although their lease was up August 1, they were in contract through September 1 due to a required 60 day notice.  Although we stressed at first about this, we just knew it would work out the way it was supposed to and we had total peace.  Finally Jim came back to us and said they wanted to move in as soon as possible and they would pay be able to pay for August!  Praise God!!!  Just shows, we never have to worry when God is in control.

Every next prayer request we come up with, it is quickly answered.  First the house prayer was answered.  Then that Sean's transfer would be approved and it was.  Then that our bedroom set would sell and it did within a couple of days and on the first phone call!  Right now the big request for me is that my license would all come through on time so that I can start work August 13.  So please be praying for this.  I am choosing to not worry about it.  Just staying on top of all that has to be done, but beyond that, its out of my control.

So on to more fun things.... like packing!!!!  Oh my gosh!  I forgot how much work it is.  And Sean is doing the hard part!  I can't imagine if Sean had gotten a promotion and we would have had to do all of this and be out of here in two weeks!  There's no way!  All my pictures are down, my decor is down, everything is quickly being boxed up.  Its weird and yet so exciting too.  I keep waiting to freak out but it never comes.  It feels right.  I'm really excited.  Although I have had a couple moments so far where reality was a very sad thought... and brought my first tears.

Yesterday we had a yard sale with Brett and Mattie (Sean's brother and our sister-in-law).  It hit me all of the sudden, as I was sitting next to my 20-something week pregnant sister-in-law, that I would not be around for the birth of my newest nephew.  The tears began to come.  Later in the day, I read my friend, Lisa's, blog she did with pictures of our trip to zoo two days before.  But it was more than that.  (I copied and shared her blog here on mine.... check out the pics if you haven't already)  She posted all the pics Emery and the twins have taken together.  From newborn babies until today.  They've had St. Patrick's Day, 4th of July, Christmas, weddings, and birthday pics taken together!  And I realized they would stop here.  The tears flooooowed!!  We are also their godparents but will relinguish this honor so that their godparents will be local.  I'm finding that dealing with leaving, and missing, all the kids in my life will definitely be the hardest.  Adults will understand and will not forget you, but the kids might.  :( I just want my nieces and nephews to know me and love me and have relationship even from a distance.  Its the youngest ones I worry about the most because they are still forming memories of you.  But pictures and birthday cards and skype! will be our best bet!  I know the Lord will cover their little memories.  And when we do visit, the time spent will be of much more quality.

That's it for now.... back to packing!

A Day at the Zoo with the Beau-friends!!!!

I completely copied this from Lisa's blog!!  But I couldn't lay it out and word it any better!  I cried for the first time looking at these pictures.  I am definitely going to grieve not seeing these boys grow up in person.  I had dreams of Emery growing up with them and they being best friends (and maybe marrying one of them!).  They are definitely one of the hardest ones to leave behind aside from my own family.  Lisa and I have gone through so much... from infertility to having these miracles and through the adjustment of life in 

their first 17 months.  I am so blessed to have them in our lives!  I guess they will come to dread visits back home because we will pick up where we left off and it will be hours of picture taking of the three of them!!!

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Evan, Emery and Ryan- best buds!

Yesterday the boys and I spent the morning at the zoo with Amy and Emery.  Many of you know how Evan, Ryan and Emery are all long-awaited miracles.  After Amy and I walked alongside each other in our season of infertility, the Lord blessed us both with children that were born just 2 weeks apart.  So Evan, Ryan and Emery have spent their entire lives together (well, all 17 months of their lives.)  They are like three little peas in a pod.  Here's a quick glance back at the torturous pictures Amy and I took of them at nearly every major holiday or milestone of their first year of life...

First St. Patrick's Day

First Easter

First 4th of July

 

First Christmas season (playing with nativity scene)

Emery's First Birthday

Evan and Ryan's First Birthday

Playing together before heading off to the zoo.

Gotta love the minivan so we can all ride together!

Amy and Emery feeding the giraffe.

Watch out Em!  Ryan is after your bow AGAIN!

Snack time

We sat for a really long time in the rainforest exhibit so we could just talk and cool off near the waterfall.

We had such a great day!

Then it was time for another photo shoot.  We've always had a hard time getting all three of our children to look at the camera at the same time.  But, now we have the added challenge that they like to escape (it was so much easier when they just laid where we set them.)  But, they are ever so cute!

Evan, Emery and Ryan

Two of the three are looking....getting closer.

Ryan was getting a bit frustrated with his drink.

Lunchtime!

Em with her monkey she got at the zoo...oh I am going to miss this sweet face!!